And dealing with it. So. Umm lately I have been dealing with some people that don’t really seem too happy about the things that I’ve done for them or gifts given and one thing is for sure when this feeling comes to you it sucks. I guess it wouldn’t be so bad if I was just didn’t worry about it but I am so used to this kind of stuff happening to me and it hurts. I don’t know what makes some people think that they need to be everyone’s priority or that I should have done what I did. And then in one case I felt some weird vibes from someone and for some reason I just had it on my mind that they really didn’t like the gift that I got for them. I can understand this. Maybe I should have asked if they would like what I was going to give to them, you know thinking that we were on same level so since this was a fact that they would like what I liked but I guess not huh. I guess a bad gift can really cause people to ignore you and throw shade but was it that serious? If I did something for you it came from the heart and because I care about you but nowadays people focus so much on whether or not you have a good job to ensure that this person will bring you a great gift.

This same reason is why the holidays are meaningless now because everyone wants expensive gifts instead of those two things you will never be able to buy, LOVE and TIME. I enjoy spending the holidays with my family but I remember there being times around Christmas when some were annoyed with whatever on that day. I was like, “oh my, are you serious?! God woke you up this morning, be thankful!“. Now I think it may be better to start spending the holidays alone, where I can enjoy my own company. To me, it isn’t about gift giving or just coming together to eat but the time that we spend together is always awesome to me; I love it. Even if many people were making $1,000,000 dollars a day, how much you want to bet they will still be plum miserable. I guess this is just going to be one of my rants for the day though. Like I said, things like that upset me because I know that I put a lot of thought into many things that I do for people but I also know I got to keep kicking. Experiences like the ones I’ve gotten make you open your eyes and hope and pray that you didn’t treat someone else with ungratefulness too. You must always be careful not to do what was wrongfully done to you unto others as well.

You will NEVER know someone else’ struggle.

And it’s so amazing how many of us continue on in life with smiles and happiness galore. I started this out one way but after a while of thinking about it, I would like to take another route. It just seems like today, we are having to do MORE work to be LESS satisfied–why is that? I mean after all, all of this new age inventions were meant to give us way more leisure time than working time. Now in today’s world, I am seeing people actually picking up two sometimes three jobs just to make ends me. Umm, that doesn’t sound right. I myself used to think about getting second jobs while in my first initial job because almost everyone I worked with had second jobs and they were my age, younger or adults. Many of them complained but others kept on keeping on. It reminds me of a girl who was in my Chemistry lab class and she was a EMT or a paramedic and she was coming into class knowing what she was doing. But there were times where I looked at her and she looked like she was about to fall asleep in midair. I wanted to ask for her help with some problems but I felt too bad to even be that selfish. She was smart though and I guess the reason she was working a full-time job and going to school (which they say is a no-no for science majors) was of personal matters so you just never know. You will never know someone else’ struggle and how they are dealing with it without having to go public with it. I too have been learning to NOT OPEN MY MOUTH about the personal things that are going on with me. It’s almost like whenever I do, things really get worse and so I just learn to stop speaking on my weary situations and to start speaking on my future victories. I know I don’t do so well with saying, “thank you Jesus” for the good and the bad but with everything happening, I am able to see that it is God working in my better good. Thank you God and I am going to keep on keeping on and do better to COMPLAIN LESS and PRAISE MORE. Peace <3