Man, where can I begin? I don’t know but this may be one of those all over the place rants so please bare with me. I often get annoying comments about my hair from others but I just tend to ignore it. Sometimes I ponder over them and think about if what they told me is truth or not but then again I come to the realization that it was just hot air coming out of their mouths. Ever since I was younger, I’ve always taken pride in my hair and that being mainly because I always got compliments on it even when it was in its natural form which was either one afro puff or two. Only thing with this is…my compliments were mainly from white people who really didn’t care about the facts of being “natural” or anything like that they just liked my hair. Though many of my friends gave suggestions about straightening my hair and I let one of my friends do it about one or twice I believe I never had to worry about doing much to my hair. And since my hair gave me so much confidence of course I would be worried about my hair more than anything else with me and that’s how it has been ever since.
When I started college, I got tired of the old Jheri curl juice (mainly Care free Curl and S-Curl no drip activator and some others…) and I wanted to find something more mature to me. I knew that a lot of girls were wearing weave but wearing hair that wasn’t mine never sit too well with me. Yes, I did it for braids but not for to achieve a longer hair look. Though I will admit the girls who always had their hair done always looked so nice, I just could never find confidence in believing that hair weave would make me look better. And after playing through many of my sister’s wig collection I just came to the real with myself that wigs don’t look nice on my face either and there isn’t anything WRONG WITH NOT WANTING TO WEAR HAIR EXTENSIONS TOO. But in these days and times, having confidence means having lace fronts and such in your hair and having make up on your face but I just don’t believe that. At many times though, I felt like I needed to start wearing make up and hair extensions to prove to people that I was indeed confident…but the idea just never sat well with me. BUT. But I did finally think it was time for me to try something new and so I decided to put a texturize in my hair. A texturizer perm does straighten your hair but not permanently like a regular perm would. BUT. But I wasn’t really used to taking care of my hair with the texturizer in it like I could do with my natural hair before which was just adding product and being ready to go. Oops.
So then my hair started thinning out and I started to freak but no one ever knew how upset I was about my hair but me. I called my cousin and then had my hair cut down really short in 2011 and so I’ve been rocking I guess “natural“…again since then. Let me say this though, I HATE BEING ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT BEING NATURAL because it’s always the same old questions. I never have time in a conversation to explain that I’ve always been natural and that I had to cut my hair because I wasn’t taking care of it with that texturizer in it. That, and I feel like I am supposed to be this guru on being “natural” when I am still learning myself. Really, this whole trend has gotten me confused because my old ways are showing up to be “not good enough” for natural hair. And whenever I first cut my hair someone asked me how long I’ve been natural and I inadvertently responded but with me being oblivious to the whole “natural moment” that was taking place. When I cut my hair, I honestly WAS NOT AWARE THAT ALL BLACK GIRLS WERE CUTTING THEIR HAIR FOR A MOVEMENT and let’s be real that’s exactly what it was and is. A movement, a trend. So now whenever girls ask me how long I’ve been natural it’s almost like they really only want to calculate how long it is taking for my hair to reach my back in length. And because its not I guess that means I am not using the right product or twisting all the time since my hair isn’t down my back….oh my gosh and I dumbly respond to the questions too.
And other things that really urk me are the girls who AREN’T natural who always seem to have the MOST advice on what I could do to my hair. I have been told so many times by girls who do wear hair extensions that they have the same hair pattern/texture as me and I just say “oh okay“. One being is because I don’t care to bash black women for wearing hair extensions because it is what it is. Women, black women, you have to come to terms with yourself and make sure that what you are doing with your hair is the right choice for you and your hair and not for America and its bi-polar ways. And bi-polar I am meaning one moment you are hearing black America telling black women that the weave wearing epidemic has gone too far and that we need to be confident in our natural look and then the next minute black America is saying that this natural trend has to stop and black women look bad in their natural hair. Well what is it? I don’t and would never go to another black girl and ask her why she wears lace fronts but I often get questions about why I don’t do this or that to my hair and it stinks. It often doesn’t bother me but when you’ve got something on your mind such as your appearance, and I don’t worry about that often but it does come to mind, the last thing I want to hear is a hair suggestion that you may have saw on Youtube, come on now. I HATE TRENDS and following them is just not me but this natural thing just sort of happened that way.
I do take pride in my hair and you MAY not like the way that I wear it, but it works for me and that’s all that matters. And this is NOT a black and white issue either because when I stayed in Tuscaloosa, I got a lot of compliments about my hair from black women so I don’t want it to be seen like that. It is more so the fact of people not thinking before they speak to make comments about “natural” hair that gets me.
If I offended, then I’m NOT sorry because this is a RANT. Good day sir.